Are you looking to rekindle your love life? Do you suddenly find yourself aroused by Furries, Plushies, and/or Adult Babies? Dr. Linda Knudson & Family have years of experience in the ever-changing field of love. Let her and her friendly and flexible staff assist you with all of your issues. The staff is impeccable, the clientele discreet, and the whipped cream is plentiful in this Upstairs/Downstairs farce.

Seeking:
Upstairs (Chateau Family dynasty):
Cindy Knudson: The good hearted daughter of former owners, Linda and the (deceased) Ted. Linda is a sex therapist constantly trying to hook Cindy up with men. She, in defiance of her parents, is dedicated to 'saving herself' for marriage - or, at least telling her mother that. Linda is constantly trying to 'therapize' her - trying to talk her into not waiting. It's very embarrassing for Cindy. She's the backbone of the hotel.

Cecily Knudson: She's the 'dowager', mother of deceased hotel owner, Ted, who, in her younger years used to be a burlesque dancer; she loves the new sexual freedom of today - she prances around like she's in her 20's. She doesn't like that Linda is a therapist and hates it when she tries to counsel anyone - especially Cindy. But she hates even more that she's responsible for keeping her son's legacy alive.

Downstairs (Chateau staff):
Harold (Harry) Bloodstone: (Hotel Manager) He is proud, takes his job very, very seriously. Very serious, humorless, in a puffed up sort of way. He always has it together.

Lacey Bottom: Young, naïve, enthusiastic maid. Wants to be a court stenographer. Falls in love with Timothy.

Cookie: he is the Chef /Maintenance Man/Bellhop who is exasperated all of the time because he has to do 3 people's jobs due to an untimely sickness working its way through the hotel staff. He is constantly running around exasperated.

Timothy Berger: (New Guy/Concierge) He is the newly hired Concierge; he was an old buddy of the Ted from way back who Linda is helping out by giving him a job. Timothy has some sort of PTSD induced Tourettes.

Guests:
Councilman Joe Allton: Town Councilman; a large, smarmy politician who has had a few mistresses; he's your traditional Chicago sleaze bag politician Vickie Mae: She is the latest mistress of the Councilman; she's a cunning and ambitious woman; she is using the Councilman for whatever he can do for her.

Chet Jones: Reporter sent to do an undercover expose about Chateau Amantius. He's a bit of a hipster douchebag, who's more into himself than anyone else. He really wants to be a hard hitting investigative reporter and resents that his employer sent him to do a fluff piece about the hotel.

Willow Applebee: She is Chet's girlfriend; total arm candy, dingbat who helps to mess things up and resolve them on accident; she is very good-hearted & innocent.

Mr. & Mrs. Smith: A random couple who clearly are regulars at the Chateau hotels; their fetish is to dress up and pretend they are different people; we see them periodically wander through as 'different' couples from time to time. (This is a bit of a play on the theater convention of having an actor (or actors) play multiple roles.)